Disconnect

These things which I so often wonder This need to create myself Frustration forgotten through slumber It's there when I wake, defeated before I rise I'd pull myself out of this mire If I could collect my strength Or muster an ounce of desire Finding the words, and making them mine Is there somewhere I could separate this feeling from memory Disconnect myself from me? Desire inside to mistreat you It pushes words out of my mouth This cyclical pattern I feed you The back & forth, & up & down But still here you are Behind this veil of pious revelation I'll close my eyes and look for worth inside I don't deserve you Relinquishing hope for the future I try not to hate it so But you are a bridge to those memories I try to forget, if you only knew Is there somewhere to occupy emotion A room to keep my rage away from you? Just tell me when these hopeless days are over I'll open my eyes and see my new sun rise I don't deserve this